PIVOT!

today over on bbp june wrote about pivotal moments in her life. that got me to thinking. what were my pivotal moments?

i'd have to start with a moment that i wasn't old enough to remember but i'm pretty sure it was pivotal in my life. apparently my birth father was abusive and although oh so not popular in the 60s my mom left him. which also included being legally adopted by my dad. all that would lend itself to pivotal.

the next would then have to be going away to boarding school in 9th grade. it would take many years to find out that i wasn't being sent away so much as my mom and dad thought they were protecting me from their pending divorce. believing i was being sent away and my parents' divorce changed my life drastically.

my first born was not a planned pregnancy. actually neither of my offspring were "planned". i was 23 and it rocked my world. i was not married. in fact children weren't even in the schedule until i was in my 30s. i was in a good career and i did end up marrying my baby daddy. as they say these days.

joining the air force. wow. i so did not think that one through. richard was unhappy with his career choices and i gave him the golden chance to do what he always wanted to do. join the air force. on hindsight it was a good choice. our life was full. maybe not always full in the good sense but it was full. my children and i have lived and visited places that mostly likely would have never been seen or experienced. met friends. kept a few.

i think it was in 2004 that i said to richard - you know, we are getting into that age bracket where we are going to start loosing people to the realm of death. and that year his mother died. 2008 two close retired military friends died. all of these deaths would become pivotal for me because they were the start of sending richard into crisis.

which would be my most current pivotal moment. adultery, divorce, empty nest, all tied up in the package of mid-life crisis. i'm not even sure that should come under the title of pivotal. is there such a word as extreme-pivotalness-to the 10th degree? i think because by 2009-2010 plans were being drafted for the next 15-20 years. work hard and retire.

i don't believe things just happen. there is a plan. and then there's maybe a plan b because of the humanity of free will. if you took away any of my one moments i would not be the person i am today. and as they say - i may not be where i want to be but i am on the way to being what i want to be.

dance on people